He Ain't Heavy...He's My Brother

Is it possible to be overly excited and dreading something all in the same moment. I am overly excited to celebrate my birthday with friends. Overly excited about seeing my brother in Hawaii. Dreading what the next year will be like while he is in Iraq. Prayer. That's all I really have. I have reassured myself that GOD is going to watch over him, while he is away. That HE is going to make a way for his wife and his kids, and that we will hear from him regularly. That we will get updates that he will be coming home soon. But I don't know. The unknown is the scariest thing to me right now. How many other families, brothers, husbands, wives, pray for the same thing? How come their prayers weren't answered? How come they were sent there in the first place? All these questions. And the fact of the matter is, everyday closer I get to seeing my brother, is another day closer for his deployment. It's hard being the strong one in the family. Hard shouldering the concern, and the hurt, and the acceptance. It's hard when you're expected to have all the answers. But all you have are all these questions.

"Don't mess with my money, or my kids. My husband can take care of himself," is what my mother always says. But the US Army is messing with my brother. I know he's going to come back. I just pray somewhere he will still be that little boy that peels in the sunlight, and that I used to tear up when we were fighting. And I pray somewhere he will continue to be that man that is doing something with his life, and that three little kids think that as long as their Daddy is around everything else is just fine. God speed and get home soon.