Honestly Speaking

Honestly speaking, I’m not so honest.
I’m complicated.
But if I wasn’t would you be here.
If I didn’t present a break from the norm, obviously there would be no need for me to be so honest.
Honestly.
If I was to write my honesty down it would be an epic tragedy.
If I was to sing it, it would be the saddest love song.
If I was to just do it…I would be presiding over my own eulogy…but I’m still here.
I’m still standing…still living in the now.
Still watching my life in Technicolor and digitally mastered surround sound.
Honestly speaking, I’ve walked through life unaware of my surroundings.
Right and left blinders on so I see only what is ahead.
But I can still see a future so I’m really trying to speak honestly.
Create a foundation that is not cemented in half truths.
And truthfully you must be someone short of amazing.
Truly.
My eyes aren’t protected from your light, blinders or not.
You create such a supernova of possibilities that I can’t possibly let this moment slip by.
I want to stop time, fight to live in this moment.
But I just can’t fight anymore.
Can’t make this piece sing right no more.
All there is left is left.
There used to be a time when I thought I could slick talk on the day of judgment.
Now I know for my actions all I can do is repent.
I have a Friend that I turn to that says that no one is without imperfection.
Well, I know I’m not perfect. But does that have to be my direction.
Must I love so hard for me to fall even harder.
Will my pursuit of happiness ever stop being a cylindrical pursuit
Or is confusion ever a two dimensional plane.
As I rambled my Friend smiled, eased my pain, and uttered peace be still.
Do not steal away into the night.
Do not steel away your emotions.
You’ve tried catching love 21 times.
Honestly speaking, maybe catch 22 is a commonality that obviously speaks volumes.
Honestly speaking of course.

© December 2006
Staats